Aquilla Little Notes

Love Letter.

May 10,2014, 22:15

one true love, forever in love. Is it too late? Until I realized how pathetic I am, I am a bad guy. i am sorry. I should appreciate you. It is hard to be a woman. I do not express my feeling much cause you to think much. I do not heal your broken heart all I could. Sorry. I hurt you. Please forgive me. I am sorry. I did not know. You are calm. We used to text first in the morning and last before going sleep. Rainy days are over then start the day with smile. I am sorry darling. Accept my apology with all my heart. Pretending not to love you was the hardest thing thing I had to do. How do I live without the only one I love? I need you, truly love you. I am so sorry. I am so sorry. You are everything. I do not want to lose you. I am sorry. My princess, my angel. Please do not get tired of me. I have so much to say but you are so far away.

p/s: eternal love. I love you Kekanda Syauqi.

Ragam.

Hidup aku begitu mudah. aku bersyukur. aku gembira. Tapi hairan. Aku cukup hairan. Tapi mereka berkata itulah ragam manusia. Ya. aku tahu ragam manusia. Tapi aku tetap tidak mahu menerima jawapan 'ragam manusia'. Aku ingin tahu. Apakah masalah mereka? Mengapakah mereka bersikap demikian. Aku hanya ingin tahu walaupun hanya aku yang tahu. Aku tidak suruh mereka mengaku mereka bersikap begitu. Aku cuma ingin tahu. Aku rasa mereka tahu. Cuma tidak mahu mengaku atau pura-pura tidak mahu tahu. Aku cukup berani untuk tahu untuk mengaku. Kau?

berkelahi cara melayu, menikam dengan pantun, menyanggah dalam senyum,marahnya dalam tertawa, merendah bukan menyembah, meninggi bukan melonjak.

Berdamailah cara melayu, silaraturahim yang murni, dimulut sama dihati, maaf sentiasa bersahut, tangan dihulur bersambut, luka pun tidak lagi berparut. (Usman Awang, 1988)

A blessing of being close is to know that someone cares about you: care what you do and what happen to you. But caring also means interference and disapproval.

p/s: Kau fikirlah sendiri.

Graduation day of Us (Bachelor of Science Geomatics (Honour))

Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah. 29 november 2014 was our graduation day. That day was my big day! I am so happy and I am so grateful. however, i have a hole in my heart that day. I miss someone on that day that i hope to be there. Still i am grateful. Through out the year i am such a nerd! fucking nerd stay in the library most of time. I do have some regrets the way i treat myself during the final year. Skip drama thing, let jump the UITM 81-Convocation day!

i was arrived at UiTM Shah Alam at 7.20 because we have to get ready before entering the hall. We parked near to DATC which is a relieved for me because my grandma cant walk against stairs. 100 stairs no way! Here some morning pictures!

nenek and ibu

feel morning light!

Meet Nesh Adam

After grandma and mom enter hall to get sit as audience, me went to backstage. We were queued to get our sit number. Sit number represent your degree rank and class of degree hold. The arrangement also by your course. I am AP220.

Get our number

Smile
(Fatin, Kak Tim, Farah, Fiza, Zaidatul)

Prof. Nasri
(Tima, nani, Cheda, Nini,-,P.Nasri, Nesh, Fiki)

Waiting for VIP
(Zaidatul, Ain, Me, Afizah, Tim, Farah, Ayu, Fazreena)

Boys of my class
(Shahril, Izwan, Farish, Syahir, Zaim, Timie, Adi, Fazrihan, Abg Yusof, Marwan)

We all waiting..

The front row
(Fiza, me, Ain, Zaidatul, Afi)

Our name been announced and we went on stages back to our sit. Different story for three of us. Three of who? among of our classmates just three of us obtain ANC. (Anugerah Naib Canselor) Alhamdullillah.

The ANCs Holder
(Me, Fazreena, Zaidatul)

We finally done. Out of hall!! We wait so long because thousand of student graduate that day. so here free style picture me and friends. Enjoy!

some smiling some exhausted.
(Nesh, Abang Yusof, Timie, Adi, Fazreena, Ayu, Zaim)

We just so happy!
(Syahir, Ain, Me, Kak Tim)

the only Chereen

Thank you for Aina Nazirah and Siti, my lovely juniors for coming to my big day!

Sorry, i look away. Haha

The Sister!

Here, I would like tos how my grateful and thank you to all lecturers! First semester thank you to Radhi, Farish, Kecik and Nesh for being my group member and we finally make it in the first semester. Radhi is sweet talker and dependent person. Farish is realistic and optimist. Nesh is brilliant girl with accent. Accnet that only come out when she talk british. During Survey camp, i make more friends, Asyraf, ya handsome boy of our class, Kak Tim sweet and caring sister, Izwan is a joker and he's funny, Kama is another beautiful girl i know and Huda is some girl i know. Meet new friends, Tima and Fatin as field work group and we making such a combination as first girl field work team during first year. We all so strong and though and together we achieve more than i ever wanted. Tima such most gentle and sweet girl. Fatin most fun and lovable girl among us. Second year become more struggle year of time i have been study. Most strongest engineering team i ever had was with Abang Yusoff and Mejar Najamul. These people are legend and they are nuts! Abang Yusof known as cool and relax student and he would like try anything to make anything possible! Mejar is like a brother to me which is he is caring and lovely person. Crazy crisis, scandal, gossip and rumors. Even with all that stuff, i finally make it. I found love between our friendship, Huda, Farah, Fiza and Aishah which is a great companion. I am lucky to have a friends like you girls. Farah is strongest and full committed girl i ever meet. Fiza is a girl come with joy, laugh and selfie queen. Haha. Aishah is a girl that a so sweet and you cant say no to her and her most adorable smile! Friendship bring to next level where me and Huda become housemate and we are twins! Ya, twins because we are look alike. Huda, is not just another girlfriends i know, i ever meet or fight with. She just a person with good heart. I make a lot of friends all these year studied at UiTM, Jai, Chereen, Elly, Fendi@Abah, Fiqi, Afi, Marwan, and a lot more! Dr.Wan's student were Syahir, Ain, Kechik, and Izwan. We finally make it! Thank you all my friends and lecturers! We all achieved more than i ever wanted.

p/s: student life is the best!

unconditional love

Hi everyone. My last entry was on January and now is November and you know what i graduated. I spent my year as final year student. So spent most my time as final year student at library with laptop and books. I even slept in the library. i just realise how terrible i am to spent my last year as student. I hope in future able to further my study for Master in GIS. Alas, my final year project was GIS project which is visible analysis. I will save that later for another entry.

Now, i am graduated and have first class degree of honour. Impressive. I finally make it! but what i can make it is i am unemployed. That is totally hurt my pride as first class degree holder. I am not choosy but i believe in Allah s.w.t arrangement for me. Maybe it is not time yet.

Meanwhile i at home i help my aunt with her on-line business that sell jubah/dress. I love fashion. since we just get started it nothing to be busy so i kill most of time watching movie online. I have seen a lot of movie past few months. I can't count how many movie. I think i can receive Guinness Book of Record because i watching more than three movie per day. That crazy right.

Since i watching a lot movie, thriller, horror, animation, romantic, mystery or even action. My heart always be touch with story in these story. one of my favourite movie Maleficent say that true love does not exist. In the other Horn cast by Daniel Radcliffe different point of view of love. Why i am talking about love. i dont know, i just wonder what is unconditional love? How many of you have unconditional love? for me and my relationship. i dont know it is unconditional love but i do know i need him in my life. Some of us want eternity love. People always made promise and vow to the one they love but end up crush their heart. Why they did that? it is for hope or desperate? how your unconditional love?

I just want to believe in unconditional love. i want to have unconditional love. Unconditional love that i want is no promise, nothing but just love. A couple that enjoy time together. A couple truly believe in their love. A love that take both lover to a stages of eternal happiness. Even at end they weren't together they do not hurt because they enjoy love during they together to fell sweet love.
A love story that lead you to a life that you will believe that you will never be hurt by love. it is true love is hurt. it just you have to find someone is worth hurting for. For me, i already fine someone is worth melting for, die for, waiting for, or hurting for. I miss you, Syauqi.

p/s: if you believe in true love, it is everywhere. My true love is with sweet! haha

Christina Perri-Human

I can hold my breath
I can bite my tongue
I can stay awake for days
If that's what you want
Be your number one

I can fake a smile
I can force a laugh
I can dance and play the part
If that's what you ask
Give you all I am

I can do it
I can do it
I can do it

But I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human

I can turn it on
Be a good machine
I can hold the weight of worlds
If that's what you need
Be your everything

I can do it
I can do it
I'll get through it

But I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human

I'm only human
I'm only human
Just a little human

I can take so much
'Till I've had enough

Cause I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and i break down
your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human

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